detectivetroll | [Commentlog] | [closed] - backdated to earlier in the human event

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[Commentlog] | [closed] - backdated to earlier in the human event

[After talking with Julian and Kagerou on the journals and promising to drop by their rooms with dinner, Nick heads down to the kitchen. Monroe isn't really coming out of his room at the moment, either, which means Nick is pretty much just a food delivery service tonight.

Maybe he should try to get tips.

After grilling up some chicken, potatoes, and bread, and slicing up tomatoes and cheese, Nick brings the lot up to the barracks. He stops by Julian's room first, knocking on the door and announcing his presence.

He picks up some ale before he goes to Kagerou's room, because hell, if Kagerou's human, he might as well have some beer, too. Even if it isn't an Oregon microbrew.]

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[He doesn't look at him. Just nods, ever so slightly.]

Yes. It... looks that way.

[Quietly, his listens, cataloging those options away for later. He doesn't think he can swim, but...]

[Then he blinks, and tilts his head to one side, frowning.]

... have what?

[Hi Nick. I am less than a year old and what is sex.]

Edited 2012-09-04 03:47 (UTC)

[Nick doesn't reply to that, but smiles, just a bit, glad to be able to at least offer that.

And then the smile turns to pretty much a deer in headlights look at Kagerou's question, because what.

No, really, what. This is - they were buddies have drinks, man, that is not the kind of question that is supposed to come up.]

...tell me you've heard of sex before.

[The deer in the headlights look is returned by a blank stare.]

[Seriously, Nick, he's a robot. What did you think he was going to answer?]

... I can't tell you that.

[...that he'd had the talk with someone else? Anyone else?

Seriously who builds a robot with human intelligence and feelings and doesn't tell him about sex. Didn't they consider the possibility that he'd be having drinks with an unsuspecting human friend sometime in the future?]

Uh. Okay. Well. It's something humans do, as a means of procreation. Or just to have fun. Usually just to have fun.

[No this isn't awkward at all.]

[... Saejima would probably have had no problem educating his robots on the subject. Toudou on the other hand...]

[So, no, he's a bit clueless on the entire subject. Which means he just ends up staring at Nick, still blank. He's clearly waiting for more of an explanation than that.]

But... what is it?

[Damn it Toudou.

Nick needs more to drink to deal with this, which means he pretty much downs the rest of his beer.]

Right. Well, it involves parts. That interlock.

[No seriously what is he supposed to say. Nick hadn't exactly planned on giving any version of The Talk any time soon.]

When two people who are interested in each other, in more than just friendship - or sometimes not even friendship, just sexually - they, well, have sex. For a man and a woman, that usually involves the man putting his penis in the woman's vagina. For two guys, or two girls, it's different, but just as fun. Or probably for the two girls, anyway, but I can't exactly say that from personal experience.

[Okay, tangents, Nick needs to not go on them.]

It's a part of a relationship, usually. Two people who love each other, or have a connection to each other. It's a way to be intimate, to feel pleasure and make your partner feel pleasure in return.

[Oh, interlocking parts. He can understand that.]

[But then the conversation keeps going. His head slowly tilts to one side. Honestly? He has never heard some of these words before. There was no reason to. He was just going to have his memory wiped, so why load him down with too much data he wasn't going to use.]

[And... some of this isn't adding up.]

If you need interlocking parts, how does... it happen if you have two of one?

[Yes, Nick, he is asking this question.]

Do... you need to do this...? To feel a connection...?

[...right, of course he asked that. Clearly this conversation wasn't done until Nick had to awkwardly attempt to explain gay sex.]

Well, then it's never for procreation, strictly for fun or intimacy. Even if you have two of one, there's still ways to, uh, interlock. There's a lot of things you can do with hands and mouths and other parts.

[This would be so much easier if they had access to the internet right now. Nick is really hoping he doesn't have to go into more detail than that, because he's only had enough alcohol to make this mildly less awkward.]

No, you don't. A lot of times, you feel the connection before. But sometimes it makes the connection stronger. And it's a way of expressing what you feel.

[He appears to process this in silence, toying with the bottle in his hands.]

What if you don't have any of those interlocking parts...? But... you want to make it stronger, anyway?

[Congratulations, Nick. You've progressed from being asked about gay sex to gay robot sex. How does that feel?]

[Silence is good. Silence means he's hopefully getting it, or at least he's not asking any more awkward questions.

Until that. So yes, apparently this conversation can get more weird and more awkward. If ever Nick wanted to know what could top having to explain sex to a man who looked like he was Nick's age, here it is.]

Is this the one you were talking about, back home?

[Nick's assuming yes, though, no matter Kagerou's answer.]

I don't think that's something anyone can tell you. That's the kind of thing you have to try for yourself, to see what works for you both. What you like, what feels good. You could always start with kissing.

[Sorry, Nick. He trusts you not to hurt him, or try and erase him. Which means you're the go-to guy for these kinds of confusing shenanigans. He might look your age, but that's probably due to the Keep being... itself... than his actual age.]

[More silence. Then, slowly, stiffly, he nods.]

Yes... there is no one else that I would want... that I have a connection with.

[He looks a little disappointed with the answer, though. But when he thinks about it -- kissing. Yes, he knows what that is. He'd never tried to though.]

[Thinking about it now...]

I would like to, I think. To kiss.

[Kissing Shadowmaru... that there is a very nice thought.]

[...oh. Well, the trusting part is nice. Nick's glad there's at least someone for Kagerou to go to, even if it's him. Normally that'd be especially if it's him, just... not in this exact situation.]

That kind of connection, anyway. There's more than one kind of connection to have with someone, but usually you only want this kind of connection with one person.

[Nick notices the disappointment, but there's not much he can do about it. He's not exactly equipped to discuss the finer points of robot sex.]

Kissing just for itself is really nice. It doesn't always have to lead to anything.

But after that, it's just... touching. It's learning what your partner likes. Half the fun is in experimenting, figuring out new spots.

[The other half is knowing them so well that you don't even have to try, but Nick hasn't gotten there with anyone, yet, not even Juliette.]

Yes. There's only one I want this with. No one else.

[And that's true. There's no one else he can think of that he'd want to be close to. Closer to. It would be so much easier if that person were here... if things hadn't had to change.]

[His head tilts. He's once more considering this.]

I would do that, too.

I think I'd like to. If... things were different.

That's good to know. A lot of people, it takes them a lot longer to even start to figure that out.

[He's speaking from personal experience, here, given his current relationship troubles. Even before all of this happened.

Nick's quiet for a minute, watching Kagerou closely.]

What about when we get out of here?

I'm not like a lot of people. I... think maybe I always had it figured out.

[If only because there never was anyone else in his life he'd ever wanted to be close to. To be near. To be with.]

[At the question, though, he looks away, toying with the bottle.]

That's what I... what I meant.

It wouldn't be possible. Even when we get out of here.

[Nick smiles a bit at that.]

No, you're definitely not like a lot of people I know. But yeah, I get that. Realizing you've known something for a long time, and wondering why you hadn't thought about it earlier.

[He considers, debating letting it go at that, or asking more. But well, why not? That's what drinking beers like this is for, anyway.]

Why not?

I'm not like anyone. Here, or back there, either. [He quiets again, and nods.] But... I didn't know it was possible, earlier.

[He takes a deep breath, blowing it out slowly. That's a new sensation, but a calming one. This is never an easy story to tell.]

... If I go back, I'll be captured. Erased. Killed.

And... I promised him I would live.

[Essentially promising never to return, never to see the reason he exists. Again.]

You're not. But in all fairness, no one is. It's just something to like about you.

[Though it's possibly Nick's biased, considering a lot of his friends aren't exactly what could be thought of as normal.

...and that isn't anything like what Nick was expecting. He knows Kagerou'd been on the run, from people who wanted to do that, but he hadn't connected it to the one Kagerou'd left behind.]

The people who want to do that to you, he's with them?

Is it really? I hadn't thought of it that way.

[No, really, he hadn't thought of it like that. He was always different. It set him apart from the other Brave Police units. Even from Shadowmaru...]

[There's a little shrug, and he pulls his knees up to his chest.]

He was made to be a part of their team. So... yes. I can only assume he joined them...

... after he let me escape.

Maybe not to everyone, but it is to me. I may not look it, but I'm different, too.

[He had been even growing up, though apparently he has a reason for that, now.]

'He was made to.' So I'm guessing he didn't have much of a choice?

[Nick has a thing about choices, man. Lately everyone's been trying to take his away from him, because of what he apparently is.]

You're right. You don't look it. You... just look human.

[And all human beings are exactly the same, right, Kagerou?]

[He shrugs again, resting his chin on his knees.]

Neither one of us did, no. But I was... happy. To have him as the reason I existed. He was worth living for. He still is.

But he was meant to be a part of them. They needed someone with his capabilities.

I thought I was. But I'm a Grimm. I can see things, do things, that most humans can't.

[That's all right, if Nick can tell Kagerou about sex, he can teach him that not all humans are the same.

Nick frowns slightly at that. It sounds familiar, being needed, being meant to do something, even if it conflicts with what you wanted.]

When we get back, couldn't he leave? Escape, like you did?

You're grim? See what?

[He's trying to understand this. Really, he is.]

[His head cants to the side again, that same, animal like jerk.]

Why would he?

He's... where he should be, after all.

A Grimm. It's a family name, apparently. And I see... well, creatures. What Monroe turned into, back when we were getting Change out? Where I'm from, humans can't see that.

[In all honesty, Nick's still trying to understand this. It's kind of a figure it out as he goes thing.]

But it doesn't sound like he's where he wants to be.

But I saw it. Is that because I'm not human, either?

[Maybe he couldn't see it now... but he hadn't been human at the time.]

[He shakes his head again.]

I don't know that. He seemed fine. I can't... answer that for him...

i regret nothing

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